Sunday, November 12, 2006

AussieParks Under New Management

AussieParks.com today announced at a press conference that the site has recently changed owners, and revealed that under this new management they will be pioneering a new, innovative style of journalism.

The style, which has been dubbed ‘journalistic minimalism’ by AussieParks staff, aims to provide the most up-to-date news, using the smallest amount of letters possible.

“Many of our recent articles, including ‘WhiteWater World construction update’ and ‘WhiteWater World Splashing Early?’ demonstrate the new technique exceptionally,” said AussieParks editor-in-chief Harold Stinton. “Journalistic minimalism involves not only creating exceptionally small, vague and poor quality articles, but also attempts to induce a feeling of disgust and remorse on the reader.”

The site has recently become a target of criticism for failing to cite speakers of quotes used in their articles.

“Uh…yeah, it’s all part of the new technique,” Stinton said on the issue. We’re kind of trying to get the ‘what the f*ck is this crap’ response from readers, you know? We want to make the reader feel that they’ve actually become dumber just from reading our articles - it’s really great.

“And by spelling the words ‘Macquarie’ and ‘Leisure’ incorrectly in our articles, we’re only enforcing the power of this new style,” added the editor, with a somewhat confused look on his face.

40 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

so damn true.

I Hate The Way They Use Capitals In Article Titles.

2:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why don't you get a life? It's never meant to have been Time Magazine, it's just a news wrapup and with the handover, I'm sure articles will be slightly longer.

Talk about bitching for the sake of bitching.

3:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

All I heard just then was "wah wah wah wah i'm a whiney bitch wah wah wah wah."

Get over it mate.

3:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

^ Someone's just happy that its not his site getting ripped into for a change

5:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just because You didnt get it Ben, and you didnt get it, GET OVER IT. Ok be, just because your website sucks and rev2 is going to be crap i bid you fairwell and have fun at your little gay website

8:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let me remind you Ben, that before you can start passing comments off about oposing websites you first have to own one that operates and provides content not just a splash page. How long did we wait for Dreamnova? 18months? and now we are waiting again..Dude get a grip and start working to get your site up rather than passing off judgement on competing sites.

10:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i agree, ben you cant go around saying stuff about other peoples sites. I dont see the formaly know website of dreamnova anywhere. where did the 18 months of waiting go? get a grip of yourself. you may think im a tool but look whos being the tool now.

11:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i agree, ben you cant go around saying stuff about other peoples sites. I dont see the formaly know website of dreamnova anywhere. where did the 18 months of waiting go? get a grip of yourself. you may think im a tool but look whos being the tool now.

11:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lmao, I love it how all of you are "anonymous" and then yet, all of your posts seem to start the same and nearly repeatted, just slightly adjusted to sound different.

Now, funnily enough, I still write articles for AAL while DreamNova's in beta-testing, and hey, my site got pounded to all hell by Mark, but I thought it was hilarious, so close your hole next time and get a grip.

Ben out ya'll!

12:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ROFL! funniest comment on this blog EVER:
------------
All I heard just then was "wah wah wah wah i'm a whiney bitch wah wah wah wah."
------------
LOL

1:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ben which articles did you write on this site? i remember one poking fun at really old posts on r-c. if there have been others i've missed them, but 1 article is far from what i'd call "still writing articles".

and when will dn reopen?

-B "other ben" EN

4:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well maybe Ben you should stop writing articles for AAL, pull your finger outta your arse and get a move on with Dreamnova. Seriously, it's getting beyond a joke all these promised things and the time it takes. You promised all the new features in REV2 for REV1 but they didnt appear. What will the next excuse be?

Dreamnova.net...Hmm seems as though Richard is moving in..haha

7:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Richard is moving in? Huh?

5:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As in Richard has purchased the dreamnova.net domain name and red-directed it to his server..

7:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

what a dog act

10:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree, he should just consentrate on his own site rather than trying to get pple away from DN

11:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

lol dreamnova.net, thats awesome

5:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, he's a real jerk doing that.

9:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I agree, he should just consentrate on his own site rather than trying to get pple away from DN"

rofl. DN is dead

i'm not saying that buying dreamnova.net isn't wrong (it is), but its kinda stupid to say that he's stealing ppl considering DN doesnt have ppl to steal. i just looked and rc has 1,041 members accordnig to its forums. i cant tell with dn coz its closed (surprise!!) but last time i went it was nowhere near that (like maybe 50 or something).


lol and mr anonymous you have a serious case of split personalities. why cant ppl use their names?

12:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

why cant ppl use their names?
Because you touch yourself at night.

4:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wanna know why I want to stay anonymous?

It's all because I am FULLLLLLLLY Sick, and my mum is also FULLLLLLLY sick!

6:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Because you touch yourself at night."


hahahahahahaha omg hilarious!! you deserve an award for services to comedy. it's a shame such a remarkable piece of humour should go down in history as 'anonymous'.

(maybe you should stay anonymous if that's the best you can do.)

7:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Has anyone seen the ridiculous 'press release' on Aussie Park's site advertising the fact that they have new ownership. It is an absolute joke. It is like a direct copy of a Macquarie Leisure press release. How many times can they use the line "further stregthens our position in the market"? What market? I swear what is it with all these 12 year olds who put together Aussie theme park sites and think they are running some sort of company. That's why we never see any content because they are all too busy playing 'office' and not actually delivering what people want. So sad

7:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey come one, its awesome that sites here release press releases as if an actual media source will run them. Who needs content when you can work the media afterall.

8:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ben, that is a quote from this totally non-mainstream comedy you probably haven't heard of called 'Family Guy'.
It didn't have an ounce of creativity.

8:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yeah i know that's where it was, i'm a big fan of family guy... that doesn't mean that when the quote was used above it was even remotely funny, which is what my point was.

9:15 PM  
Blogger AAL said...

Johnny, I love you. That is all.

12:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

^ Meryl Steep, I love you. That is all.

11:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why did all the dinosaurs die out?
Because they learned to suck their own cocks.

10:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aren't you the height of maturity?

9:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

aal loves the cock! yes he does! yes he does!

johnny, shut up! shut up! fifty years ago, we'd have you upside down with a fork up your ass! nigger! nigger! nigger!

2:06 PM  
Blogger AAL said...

^Good Lord - you Sir, are an absolute genius. I love how you've incorporated Michael Richard's racist tirade into your response, it was just hilarious - I mean, racism being such a hilarious issue and all. You rock. Oh, and 'AAL loving the cock' - that's gold too. I mean, the entire notion of an inanimate blog "loving the cock" is just comedy gold. You should be doing standup. You're a genius.

(Die in a fire, you ignorant bogan)

7:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not saying the blog loved the cock. You do. And Michael Richards was right. and, you know, you people are pig ignorant...

go shave your legs, you nonviolent femmes!

fudafuda FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

12:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And don't fucking call me bogan, bogan. You're the one missing a tooth - have seen photos of you Marky-Mark. Do you sleep with your sister?

White trash, that's what you are.

You had a book written about you too.

THE BOGAN'S TIPPED HAIR

12:33 PM  
Blogger AAL said...

Missing a tooth? What the hell are you smoking? Why don't you post a picture of yourself - I can imagine you're exceptionally attractive - I mean, because you're so tough and all posting anonymous comments on a blog. I admire your strength. I mean, it must take a lot of courage to post anonymously.

Anyway, how about you post up that picture? There's nothing to be afraid of; we won't make fun of you. Or are you too much of a pussy to? That's what I thought. Now get a hobby you anonymous comment-posting pussy lowlife. You deserve to be shot.

1:54 PM  
Blogger AAL said...

Oh, and maybe if all you AussieParks dumbasses put as much effort into writing your own articles as you did 'insulting' our articles, you'd get a lot more done, and a lot less crap written about you.

2:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fuck. You. And The Horse That You Rode In On. Fuck. You. And The Horse That You Rode In On. You're losing thats why you have comment moderation on now - and by the way, that's also censorship. you stupid sad sack of shit.

4:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mark it's unfair to lable the anon posters as part of AussieParks. I for one can tell you that there is three people who work for the site. Myself, my brother and my brother's best mate, and I know for a fact that neither of them have posted stupid comments on here. I have made them aware that they are not allowed to contribute to the comments section on this site unless it is warranted.

9:06 AM  
Blogger AAL said...

Well, you're the only three guys that really have a vendetta against this blog, so it is likely to be one of you.

And does your brother's best friend live in the same house as you? If not, how can you know for a fact that he's not posting the comments on his own computer? I mean, he was pretty pissed after that 'Boomgen Travel Party' article.

On the other hand, it could be someone from Zencoaster. Pretty sure they hate us too.

4:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Granted that he does not live in the same house, however I can assure you that my brother does not post comments on here, and Rhys does not post comments on here either. I know, I check, I ask him.

I for one do not have a thing against this site, I like it think it brings a little humor to the australian amusement park community.

He was only pissed after the Boomgen travel article because his name and email was posted up on the site. Surely you can understand the issues behind that.

But just for the record, I do not have any problem whatsoever with this site, just as long as you dont use our names in the articles, but using the website name and such is all cool.

7:03 PM  

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